Monthly Archives: April 2013

I Just Want to Feel This Moment

I turned the corner to fields of green tucked around the curves of one of my favorite back roads. I wanted to stop and take a picture but instead decided to keep driving with the radio turned up just enjoying the moment.

Heading back to the city it felt good to soak in the open spaces and the freeing feeling of being the only person on the road. “This is it,” I thought, the perfect combination of living in the city but not living too far away from family and the beauty of peaceful scenery. In moments like that I sometimes think back to a college chapel service. The speaker spoke from Psalms 73 emphasizing the phrase “The nearness of God is my good.”

“As you go through life take time to lean your head against the glass -whether that be the glass of an airplane window or a window in your home- and take a minute to remember the phrase ‘the nearness of God is my good.'” His words stuck with me. I guess for the idea that no matter what is swirling around you in life whether it be success or tragedy remain near to God.

It was easy to feel near to the presence of God on that drive last week. Today I was desperate for His nearness for an entirely different reason after receiving a call saying that my aunt Martha who lives in Kenya is deathly sick. To be honest, I feel numb. It doesn’t make sense. It came on so fast. The doctors are saying it is septicemia and there is not much they can do for her. She is on a respirator thousands of miles away. There is nothing I can do but pray. I feel helpless. I feel shocked, but I also feel hope knowing that I pray to a powerful God who is capable anything. It’s harder to trust in the difficult times. It’s so easy to get angry and ask why because honestly it really just doesn’t make sense, but even in these moments (especially in these moments) I still cling to the truth- the nearness of God is my good. I will make the Lord my God my refuge.


Filed under Contemplations